Monday, February 25, 2013
Oops, it was a blizzard.
We got well over a foot of snow, but I stayed inside oblivious to it as the men did all the shoveling and also helped the kids build a snowman. Roads are clear again now and we didn't lose power.
Saturday, February 23, 2013
40 weeks + 6 days + norovirus - blizzard
At this point in my previous pregnancies, my oldest was an hour old and my second baby was a week old. So I'm officially pregnant longer than I've ever been pregnant before. Because my second came so quickly (1.5 hour precipitous labor), my stepdad, mom, sister, and BIL all arrived a week ago from out of state. While everyone knows it's easy to go past an estimated due date, acknowledging it and experiencing it are always two different things. With my husband being home, five people have missed a week's worth of work waiting on Naomi. Luckily all of the various employers are being accommodating of our situation. My mom and stepdad are staying at a nearby hotel and my sister and BIL are staying with us.
Unfortunately, along with our guests came a nasty case of norovirus. It hit my stepdad on Monday after which he stayed quarantined at the hotel. Then my mom on Wednesday. On Thursday at 3:30am, I abruptly woke up to my 2yo standing in my face with what I thought was snot all over his hands. It wasn't snot. On Friday, my 6yo's teacher said she thought dd wasn't feeling well as she had fallen asleep at a school assembly at the end of the day. Later that evening, I walk by her in the living room and she tells me, "Mommy, go look in the bathroom but TAKE YOUR SOCKS OFF, ok? Take your socks off. I said take your socks off!" (I guess I have a bit of a rep for being disgruntled when my socks get wet from water on the bathroom floor.) The bug had hit her too and she hadn't made it to the toilet. Later on while moaning and waiting for it to strike again, she turned to daddy and said, "I miss being myself." My sister and I succumbed overnight, so dh and BIL are the last two standing. Luckily the grandparents are all well enough now to take over caring for the kids. The 2yo hit 24-hours without vomiting early this morning (and also slept 12 hours straight, unusual for him), and while the 6yo had much more frequent and intense episodes last night, has also been fine since then. My sister and I have each spent most of the day in bed, but seem to be recovering well. Other than the few times I have been in the bathroom, I haven't had other pain or nausea. Just feeling very drained of energy. My poor sister has been having "sympathy contractions" though, as she called it. Her and BIL have retreated to the hotel room.
We are in NH and the weather reports had been calling for a blizzard this weekend. Luckily the storm has declined and now we're just looking at some crummy roads and a few inches of snow. Not great but nothing like the Nemo storm from two weekends ago.
I know lots of people are praying for us, and at least some would like to know specifically what to pray for. So here you go.
Unfortunately, along with our guests came a nasty case of norovirus. It hit my stepdad on Monday after which he stayed quarantined at the hotel. Then my mom on Wednesday. On Thursday at 3:30am, I abruptly woke up to my 2yo standing in my face with what I thought was snot all over his hands. It wasn't snot. On Friday, my 6yo's teacher said she thought dd wasn't feeling well as she had fallen asleep at a school assembly at the end of the day. Later that evening, I walk by her in the living room and she tells me, "Mommy, go look in the bathroom but TAKE YOUR SOCKS OFF, ok? Take your socks off. I said take your socks off!" (I guess I have a bit of a rep for being disgruntled when my socks get wet from water on the bathroom floor.) The bug had hit her too and she hadn't made it to the toilet. Later on while moaning and waiting for it to strike again, she turned to daddy and said, "I miss being myself." My sister and I succumbed overnight, so dh and BIL are the last two standing. Luckily the grandparents are all well enough now to take over caring for the kids. The 2yo hit 24-hours without vomiting early this morning (and also slept 12 hours straight, unusual for him), and while the 6yo had much more frequent and intense episodes last night, has also been fine since then. My sister and I have each spent most of the day in bed, but seem to be recovering well. Other than the few times I have been in the bathroom, I haven't had other pain or nausea. Just feeling very drained of energy. My poor sister has been having "sympathy contractions" though, as she called it. Her and BIL have retreated to the hotel room.
We are in NH and the weather reports had been calling for a blizzard this weekend. Luckily the storm has declined and now we're just looking at some crummy roads and a few inches of snow. Not great but nothing like the Nemo storm from two weekends ago.
I know lots of people are praying for us, and at least some would like to know specifically what to pray for. So here you go.
- that my husband does not catch this virus, and if he does that it pass quickly before Naomi comes (this goes for BIL too of course)
- that I'm able to continue healing quickly, as this virus seems to like recurring for several days
- that Naomi waits just a bit longer to make her appearance, due to the above
- safe travel for everyone if we end up going in during this weekend's storm
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
40 weeks + 2 days...
Nothing to report yet, but figured I'd check in for those only following me by this blog. Bags are ready to go, family is here and waiting, just need Naomi to decide it's time!
Friday, February 8, 2013
He's home!!!
While local friends knew about this, anyone I communicate with primarily online probably does not as I tried not to be public about it. My husband has been living and working in another state 3 hours away since August. It was something he signed up for before Naomi's diagnosis and we decided to proceed with it anyway. We actually drove an hour in order to squeeze in the appointment with the MFM specialist to get the official diagnosis a few days before he left, as a local appointment wasn't available until the day after he left. Through the end of 2012, the kids and I would make the drive and spend the weekend with him about twice a month, and he would come home once a month, and we'd have to skip a weekend, on average. He was home (and working, but locally) for the week in between Christmas and New Year's, then we went to see him for the long weekend over MLK Jr. Day, but that's all we've seen him since December. I've pretty much been single-parenting for the last six months.
He has been very careful to not use any time-off, as his employer, the federal government, does not offer any paternity leave. (Which I think is crazy, as Wal-mart of all places gave him a fully paid two weeks!) And he only gets something like 2-3 bereavement days. We had planned for his last day to be Friday, 2/8 and he would drive back either that night or the next morning. On Wednesday the 6th I heard the weather reports and texted him to say that I thought he should leave a day early. It's one thing to be 3 hours away with a due date one week away, it's another to be this close and have blizzard predictions of crazy amounts like 20"-40" standing between you. He made it home early this morning, in time to make pancakes for breakfast for everyone. He said the roads were fine until the very end, when it was getting thick enough that everyone was choosing to drive in the same lane on the highway that was clearest. He is home for good now, unless or until we decide he should volunteer to go back. He will go back to work locally on Monday.
Some have wondered why I didn't just move down there and stay with him as the assignment could have lasted until June. We considered it, but we did not know until he arrived that his accommodations would be so large (a 2-bedroom furnished apartment that we called "the hotel" instead of daddy's apartment). We also were nervous about the assignment being cut short for some reason, and disrupting our daughter's school year. Or how to handle taking care of our home while we were gone. But perhaps the #1 reason was that I didn't want to uproot us from our social support network here. The idea of an extrovert like me being stuck in a new area with no friends, home all day with kids while he was at work, did not sound like a good idea. As nice as it is to see him every day, I thought me being that secluded would actually be more stressful for us all than maintaining a long-distance relationship would be.
On that note, now I will share with you some of the beautiful gifts I have received in the last week, all from local friends. The first pic is from a blessingway that friends threw for me last Sunday.
And here is a close-up of the hats they have made for Naomi.
The top row is actually handkerchiefs that have been converted into bonnets, and can be turned back into handkerchiefs. The basket in the first pic is full of these. It is good to have a large variety of hats so that we have better chances of having one on hand that will fit her perfectly. I will be giving any extras to the hospital, as they keep a stash of hats on hand for other special babies.
I was presented with another special craft too, but will wait until I receive the finished masterpiece before revealing it.
I have not taken a picture of my deep freezer, but I've also gotten meals from several friends. It will be so nice to have some ready-made delicious meals on hand, that we can just make when the time is right without worrying about a drop-off schedule, returning dishes, etc.
I still have an incredibly long to-do list to tackle before giving birth. I would have thought there would be less to do, as we're not preparing the house for another baby, but it feels like more. I have four sets of paperwork to complete and several people to e-mail. Lots to keep me busy during this impending blizzard.
He has been very careful to not use any time-off, as his employer, the federal government, does not offer any paternity leave. (Which I think is crazy, as Wal-mart of all places gave him a fully paid two weeks!) And he only gets something like 2-3 bereavement days. We had planned for his last day to be Friday, 2/8 and he would drive back either that night or the next morning. On Wednesday the 6th I heard the weather reports and texted him to say that I thought he should leave a day early. It's one thing to be 3 hours away with a due date one week away, it's another to be this close and have blizzard predictions of crazy amounts like 20"-40" standing between you. He made it home early this morning, in time to make pancakes for breakfast for everyone. He said the roads were fine until the very end, when it was getting thick enough that everyone was choosing to drive in the same lane on the highway that was clearest. He is home for good now, unless or until we decide he should volunteer to go back. He will go back to work locally on Monday.
Some have wondered why I didn't just move down there and stay with him as the assignment could have lasted until June. We considered it, but we did not know until he arrived that his accommodations would be so large (a 2-bedroom furnished apartment that we called "the hotel" instead of daddy's apartment). We also were nervous about the assignment being cut short for some reason, and disrupting our daughter's school year. Or how to handle taking care of our home while we were gone. But perhaps the #1 reason was that I didn't want to uproot us from our social support network here. The idea of an extrovert like me being stuck in a new area with no friends, home all day with kids while he was at work, did not sound like a good idea. As nice as it is to see him every day, I thought me being that secluded would actually be more stressful for us all than maintaining a long-distance relationship would be.
On that note, now I will share with you some of the beautiful gifts I have received in the last week, all from local friends. The first pic is from a blessingway that friends threw for me last Sunday.
I was presented with another special craft too, but will wait until I receive the finished masterpiece before revealing it.
I have not taken a picture of my deep freezer, but I've also gotten meals from several friends. It will be so nice to have some ready-made delicious meals on hand, that we can just make when the time is right without worrying about a drop-off schedule, returning dishes, etc.
I still have an incredibly long to-do list to tackle before giving birth. I would have thought there would be less to do, as we're not preparing the house for another baby, but it feels like more. I have four sets of paperwork to complete and several people to e-mail. Lots to keep me busy during this impending blizzard.
Friday, February 1, 2013
A bit of overspending, and some gifts
Last week, I did something shocking. Something I have never done before in my life.
I paid full price for new baby clothes from Gymboree. While those who don't know me might not find this statement shocking, those who do will probably be picking their jaws up off the floor right now.
Here's what $104.70 got me:
Now in my defense, I do plan to return whichever outfit and jacket is not used, but I wanted to have both on hand just in case. The left outfit is for under 5 pounds and the right one is for 5-9 pounds. I'm guessing she will fit into the one on the right. Her siblings were 10 pounds and 9lb4oz. She definitely won't weigh as much as they did as so much weight is in the skull, but even if her body is similar in size, I think she will fit into a 5-9lb outfit. Even with my big babies, newborns come out so scrunched up that they fit well in smaller clothes at first. In general, anencephaly babies run small and I'm measuring a little small too (I usually measure large). The strawberry cap is for up to 5 pounds, and then the other thing is just a little plush strawberry rattle (photo prop).
This week I decided that I should get a few more outfits too, and I went to Kohl's for Carter's outfits. This time I spent a little more at $148.11, but got a lot more:
The top left outfit is a size 6mo. I grabbed it anyway so I can remember it to look for a NB size, but looking at the Carter's website, it looks like they only manufactured it as small as 0-3mo. Everything else is newborn size. Also grabbed some cute socks and booties. I'm not sure how well they match up to the non-footed outfits as my 2yo was running up and down aisles by that point and I had to go. I still need to spend some time deciding which outfits are my favorites and which ones I would use first. Again, I plan to return the ones that we don't use. I can't decide about washing them first or not. Usually I would wash baby clothes first, but I don't really know which ones we will use. I obviously won't want to wash them after. I know Kohl's will accept the items for return even if washed (so I could theoretically just wash it all and return what's unused), but I don't feel right doing that either.
I have also received some beautiful gifts in the last week or two.
The gown, hat, and booties on top are from a family friend, my Auntie Helen. The blanket, hats, and CD on the left are from my mom's coworker Dorothy and her mom. The white blanket on the right is a prayer shawl from women at my mother-in-law Sue's church. And the u/s frame and pink heart are from my Aunt Debbie and Gram. Thank you all so much for your thoughtful and beautiful gifts.
I paid full price for new baby clothes from Gymboree. While those who don't know me might not find this statement shocking, those who do will probably be picking their jaws up off the floor right now.
Here's what $104.70 got me:
Now in my defense, I do plan to return whichever outfit and jacket is not used, but I wanted to have both on hand just in case. The left outfit is for under 5 pounds and the right one is for 5-9 pounds. I'm guessing she will fit into the one on the right. Her siblings were 10 pounds and 9lb4oz. She definitely won't weigh as much as they did as so much weight is in the skull, but even if her body is similar in size, I think she will fit into a 5-9lb outfit. Even with my big babies, newborns come out so scrunched up that they fit well in smaller clothes at first. In general, anencephaly babies run small and I'm measuring a little small too (I usually measure large). The strawberry cap is for up to 5 pounds, and then the other thing is just a little plush strawberry rattle (photo prop).
This week I decided that I should get a few more outfits too, and I went to Kohl's for Carter's outfits. This time I spent a little more at $148.11, but got a lot more:
The top left outfit is a size 6mo. I grabbed it anyway so I can remember it to look for a NB size, but looking at the Carter's website, it looks like they only manufactured it as small as 0-3mo. Everything else is newborn size. Also grabbed some cute socks and booties. I'm not sure how well they match up to the non-footed outfits as my 2yo was running up and down aisles by that point and I had to go. I still need to spend some time deciding which outfits are my favorites and which ones I would use first. Again, I plan to return the ones that we don't use. I can't decide about washing them first or not. Usually I would wash baby clothes first, but I don't really know which ones we will use. I obviously won't want to wash them after. I know Kohl's will accept the items for return even if washed (so I could theoretically just wash it all and return what's unused), but I don't feel right doing that either.
I have also received some beautiful gifts in the last week or two.
The gown, hat, and booties on top are from a family friend, my Auntie Helen. The blanket, hats, and CD on the left are from my mom's coworker Dorothy and her mom. The white blanket on the right is a prayer shawl from women at my mother-in-law Sue's church. And the u/s frame and pink heart are from my Aunt Debbie and Gram. Thank you all so much for your thoughtful and beautiful gifts.
Monday, January 28, 2013
Another unique aspect
There are so many things about this pregnancy that are totally normal, including Naomi's frequent movement and kicking. ("They" say that anencephaly/acrania babies don't move as much, but I have yet to hear even one mom say that's been true for her.) She gets the hiccups a lot, and due to that I have been able to tell that she still spins and flips directions frequently, based on where I can feel the hiccups coming from. I am 37 weeks now, and she's still often breech. This would cause a lot of panic in a normal pregnancy, yet my OB's think this is great and they hope she stays that way. Breech being good?? So weird for me to think about, even though it completely makes sense at the same time.
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Necklace
For a while now, I've been planning on getting a piece of jewelry to remember Naomi by. I don't even remember when I started thinking about it, as it's a somewhat common thing to do. I figured after she was born, I would pick something out that included her birth stone. Again, that's a typical way of doing things.
Over a week ago, the thought suddenly crossed my mind that anything I choose after she's been here and gone might not end up feeling so special in the long-run. Why not buy something now that I can wear while pregnant with her, use in special photos with her, and then continue wearing with those memories attached? I told my husband that I wanted to pick something out soon. His response was, "Uh, can you wait a few days?"
Sorry if you feel like your surprise was ruined, my love. Try to take it as further confirmation that you had a great idea. :)
*I've now shown the necklace to some people, and they all said they expected it to be gold based on this picture. It's actually silver!
Over a week ago, the thought suddenly crossed my mind that anything I choose after she's been here and gone might not end up feeling so special in the long-run. Why not buy something now that I can wear while pregnant with her, use in special photos with her, and then continue wearing with those memories attached? I told my husband that I wanted to pick something out soon. His response was, "Uh, can you wait a few days?"
Sorry if you feel like your surprise was ruined, my love. Try to take it as further confirmation that you had a great idea. :)
*I've now shown the necklace to some people, and they all said they expected it to be gold based on this picture. It's actually silver!
Sunday, January 20, 2013
36 weeks today, busy busy
I was tempted to dive into planning everything right after we received Naomi's diagnosis, but then decided to hold off until further along in the pregnancy. And oh look, that second I blinked right there? Suddenly I'm 36 weeks. I've spent the last week trying to at least get all the balls to start rolling that need to be. My first baby came 6 days late and my second came a day early, so while I don't expect to go soon, you just never know how it will work out. I have a special Naomi to-do list on my Cozi iPhone app and there are 17 things listed, and that is just a list by topic and not by specific tasks.
I realized a few days ago that while my midwife/OB practice have been supportive, they are only part of the care we both will be receiving in the hospital, and as far as I knew the hospital had no idea what was coming. I used a general contact form off their website and received an immediate reply, and by the next morning we had a meeting scheduled for Wednesday of next week. I have a list of things to cover in that meeting too, but that's only 10 long. (Stuff like the Duke study, pediatrician care, etc.) My goal is to plan as much as possible, and make someone else responsible for as much as possible. That way when the time comes and I'm in labor, all I have to worry about is giving birth and not stress about forgetting something important.
I realized a few days ago that while my midwife/OB practice have been supportive, they are only part of the care we both will be receiving in the hospital, and as far as I knew the hospital had no idea what was coming. I used a general contact form off their website and received an immediate reply, and by the next morning we had a meeting scheduled for Wednesday of next week. I have a list of things to cover in that meeting too, but that's only 10 long. (Stuff like the Duke study, pediatrician care, etc.) My goal is to plan as much as possible, and make someone else responsible for as much as possible. That way when the time comes and I'm in labor, all I have to worry about is giving birth and not stress about forgetting something important.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Hat guidelines
Click on the picture to see it full size. The text says "5 inches from base of neck to top of forehead" and "7 inches from ear to ear (over top of the head), 7 inches around the back of the head at base of neck."
A small string is definitely helpful to keep it tied on. Also some varying sizes are good, as we won't really know what will work best until we try them on her.
Monday, January 7, 2013
The Duke NTD study
A while after we received Naomi's diagnosis, I joined an online support group for mothers of anencephaly babies who have chosen to carry to term. (While technically Naomi's diagnosis is acrania and not anencephaly, the two tend to be clumped together.) From this group I learned of a research study being done by Duke University, and I contacted them about participating.
Heidi at Duke was very gentle and compassionate when I spoke to her by phone. She explained the basics and made it very clear that there would be no direct benefit in participating for me or my baby as far as treatment, etc. She asked me (a few times) whether I wanted to participate. Of course! Granted I have a bit of science nerd in me combined with an appreciation for research studies, but I can't imagine why anyone would think this was a bad idea or be unwilling. Participation involves one blood sample from me, one from the father, and a blood cord sample from the baby. They also want a few pictures of the baby's head without a hat covering it, and dh and I will have to fill out some detailed medical questionnaires.
Heidi also asked if I had any other questions. I told her how the MFM specialist had said that acrania was NOT a neural tube defect, yet this study included acrania babies. I'd done some googling and not gotten a clear answer on whether it is or not. She said that there is disagreement among the experts as to whether it is or not, so basically, we don't know! So, another good motive for participating in this study. (She didn't say that, I am.) If they don't get more info, they can't figure stuff like this out. The vast majority of anencephaly and acrania babies are aborted, which means the opportunity is no longer there to learn more about how to prevent this from happening in the first place.
Duke mailed me the kit and a packet of info. I will need to make sure the kit goes to the hospital with me to collect the cord blood (and get the blood draws from me and dh, which can be done at a different time if need be, but is easier to just do all at once to mail together). The package came in during the Christmas rush so I'm just opening it now. One of the midwives asked me to bring it in during an appointment so that they'd have time to look at it and make sure they don't have any questions about what they will need to do. They do not want possession of it until I'm in labor as it will surely get lost in the office or hospital if I leave it there beforehand.
Heidi at Duke was very gentle and compassionate when I spoke to her by phone. She explained the basics and made it very clear that there would be no direct benefit in participating for me or my baby as far as treatment, etc. She asked me (a few times) whether I wanted to participate. Of course! Granted I have a bit of science nerd in me combined with an appreciation for research studies, but I can't imagine why anyone would think this was a bad idea or be unwilling. Participation involves one blood sample from me, one from the father, and a blood cord sample from the baby. They also want a few pictures of the baby's head without a hat covering it, and dh and I will have to fill out some detailed medical questionnaires.
Heidi also asked if I had any other questions. I told her how the MFM specialist had said that acrania was NOT a neural tube defect, yet this study included acrania babies. I'd done some googling and not gotten a clear answer on whether it is or not. She said that there is disagreement among the experts as to whether it is or not, so basically, we don't know! So, another good motive for participating in this study. (She didn't say that, I am.) If they don't get more info, they can't figure stuff like this out. The vast majority of anencephaly and acrania babies are aborted, which means the opportunity is no longer there to learn more about how to prevent this from happening in the first place.
Duke mailed me the kit and a packet of info. I will need to make sure the kit goes to the hospital with me to collect the cord blood (and get the blood draws from me and dh, which can be done at a different time if need be, but is easier to just do all at once to mail together). The package came in during the Christmas rush so I'm just opening it now. One of the midwives asked me to bring it in during an appointment so that they'd have time to look at it and make sure they don't have any questions about what they will need to do. They do not want possession of it until I'm in labor as it will surely get lost in the office or hospital if I leave it there beforehand.
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